You may find it humorous that a father of a young daughter who has been desperate to date suggests that you should enjoy being single. Every dad out there has the same feelings for their daughters.

But this isn't that story.

What you never experienced was your dad before he met your mom. The four years between my divorce from my ex-wife and when I started dating your mom (some 17 years ago now) were some of the most instrumental in my life - all because I was single.

I never told you this, but I had my first girlfriend in Jr High. I know, crazy. And I dated someone almost every day between seventh grade and my first year of college. It was only then that I realized I was terrified of being alone and I really wanted someone always by my side, supporting and (more importantly) accepting me.

For the next couple years in college I didn't date (making your grandma very nervous).

The next part of the story sounds much like the earlier part. The lessons hadn't gone deep enough, and as a result, I stepped into a long-term relationship and when it didn't work, I jumped into another quickly and barely a few months later asked her to marry me.

As you know, that didn't work out, and less than two years later, I was divorced and alone.

This time I embraced it. Got some counseling. Started doing things I hadn't done before:

  • I went to the movies and only bought one ticket.
  • I went to restaurants and asked for a table for one.
  • I went on vacations - sometimes with friends. Other times, alone.

Four years. All alone. But instead of stressing about it, I learned to enjoy it.

And what happened next is really what enabled me to meet and marry your mom. I got comfortable in my own shoes. I learned to accept me. And to love myself.

Here's what you need to know - no one will ever be able to love you enough for you to feel better about yourself if you aren't already in love with yourself.

Right now you're just enjoying your first relationship - hoping that it can do everything for you. You want it to help you feel great, feel beautiful, feel accepted, feel smart, feel wanted and more.

But relationships are their own hard work, and they work much better when two whole people step into them.

Of course I'm not telling you that you shouldn't date. I'm not telling you anything except this: learn to enjoy being you. Learn to embrace being exactly who you are when no one else is around. Learn to enjoy being single.

Then, when you get time with that special someone, you're not going to place on them a burden too heavy for anyone to handle - the burden of helping you feel loved and accepted.